!

Is is psychological or do I really feel alot better? Went to see my counsellor, I was very nervous and anxious but once we got started it was brilliant. I offloaded everything that has been going on, including my reaction to my friends' illnesses. I also told him what I'd been up to since I last saw him, 5 years ago and, as I was talking, I realised how much I had achieved and how far forward I had gone. That was useful! Got home feeling positive and good.

Hubby is upset that I am again on the Effexor and it shows. Today he is better but yesterday he was really sulking. He wanted to go shopping but I decided to stay home alone. Funnily he said 'I always do everything on my own' when in fact I have been trailing behind him like a puppy for the past two months! You'd think he'd want a break!

Home alone I was very tired and so sat and uploaded stuff on my MP3 player and took things easy for an hour. The tiredness passed and I cleaned the floors. Amazingly I actually felt like doing it rather than forcing myself to.

This morning I woke up early (same as usual) but managed to nod off until 7ish. I'm in a bright and cheery mood and intend to go to the gym at lunchtime. I've actually put on my jewellery for the first time in weeks and smiled at myself in the mirror! Gave hubby a big hug and kiss and he smiled and hugged back so maybe he's okay now.

If this is purely as a result of taking one Effexor tablet after 2 months without, then it is amazing how addicted your body can get to it. I'm sure some of it is psychological but not all - the change is quite dramatic. It's as if my body actually needs this medication - so maybe it does. Time will tell.

Tomorrow I have a sponsored wax to do. I have 15 men's legs to wax for a local charity and at the moment am looking forward to it. A couple of days ago I was dreading it so it will be interesting to see how I am when I'm finally there.