Good

Day two of no tears. Excellent! Mind you, I am feeling totally exhausted for most of the day. Maybe this is another phase of the withdrawal? Anyway the morning was positive and I coped with the supermarket and visiting Mum although my energy was low. It seems to be at midday that I sap. However, my spirits were positive. Decided to work through the energy low and set about mending some broken ornaments for Mum which had been hanging about for ages. Enjoyed this. It helped me focus and I forgot the fatigue for a while. Fatigue is boring though, what to do to keep yourself occupied when you haven't got any energy?!

Hubby went out and I decided to waste time on the computer which created anxiety! How bizarre. Why was I anxious? Was it because hubby had gone out (I don't think so) or because I was bored? Very odd. Anyway he came home (relief) and then went out again to visit our friend in hospital. This was earlier than I expected and of course the anxiety continued to rise. Playing silly games on the computer was not helping so I turned on the TV and did some Brain Training. This worked a treat! Focusing on something definitely helps. By the time hubby came home I was feeling relaxed and okay.

My brain feels a bit empty today, I think the worries are quieting down. I haven't felt irritable or annoyed when the dogs get under my feet and a good part of the day felt normal. I even decided to give myself a bit of pampering in the bathroom. Listened to my meditation on breathing techniques which relaxed me enomously and I tried the same technique this morning when I woke up. It helped although it was harder because of the morning anxiety. It definitely helped though and I think I stayed in best half an hour longer.

I am beginning to feel that I can take control now. I am working out methods of coping and am finding out what I can and cannot do at the moment. Basically I can't overdo it because when I get tired I begin to feel low, as if I can't be bothered. However, this is significantly better than crying every day!

Today my work friend plans to visit which will be lovely. Also my sister-in-law should be phoning or visiting which will be interesting. I don't know if she will because she holds up so many barriers I am expecting her to make an excuse. I hope she does contact me, at least we can then remove one barrier.